I don't even know what my problem is. What the fuck is wrong with me. I ate a scoop of ice-cream today. I literally feel so sick. I need to vomit. It needs to get out of me. I really don't know why I decided to eat it. Maybe it was punishment, maybe I thought just to see what it tastes like. I don't know but right now it seems a hell of a punishment. I hate it. It's disgusting. It's like something is stuck in my throat and all I can do is, just, taste it, in my mouth, there. I think I've had about 4 glasses of water and I think it's like something is stuck there. I know, what. the. fuck. I think it's because I had a fight with my mother this morning, one of the many. Or maybe it's just punishment for everything and anything.
I am so angry. I am angry at everyone and everything. I am angry myself. I am angry at my parents for buying ice cream. I am angry at my brother for being happy. I am angry at my friends for being perfect. I am angry at the weather for not raining. I am angry at everyone whose at the snow, which I am not. I am angry I can't like boys normally without being a sulk. I am angry at the geography test tomorrow. I am angry I haven't started my r.a.p for geography. I am angry at you for being so fucking perfect at everything. I am angry that I am angry. I am angry with myself for being angry about these things. I wish I could just be happy for people. They deserve it. I don't . Fucking hell.
I also don't know why I write this, I think it's just somewhere I can leave my thoughts and rant on about things no one else really cares about, things I really don't want to tell or talk about with anyone at all. I wish these thoughts would disappear after I click 'Publish Post'. Every time I click that button, I hope the thoughts will vanish. But they never do, but here's hope again...
